Am I Alone?

April 2021

I feel like my mental health is a constant ebb and flow. From thriving one day, to really struggling a week later. Being at this point in my therapy has been difficult because it means I must put into practice what I have learned. That is not always easy, and with jobs, kids, family, financial concerns, school etc., it can feel overwhelming. Some days I climb Mount Everest and conquer the world, wildly celebrate my efficiency, and am elated to pass this onto my therapist. Other days, I sit down and just cry for the first ten minutes. I paint this picture for you because I always find myself asking "Am I okay?" "Is this normal?" "Am I losing it?".

The answer, to my disbelief every time I approach my therapist about this, is that I seem like a totally normal person. WOW....I don't often feel normal, everyone else seems so together, and many days I spend far too much time worrying (something we are working on). But every day I show up and try to be better regardless of my mindset. My therapist is quick to remind me that life is not constant, it will ebb and flow, so will my reactions to those changes. The important thing is that when faced with adversity instead of crying, running, or sticking my head in the sand, I stop, think, consider every side, and make a plan.

I really just hope someone struggling with this same thought process reads this and knows they are not alone, and that it's totally normal to have ups and downs. Just remember to keep moving, thinking, and be just a little bit better than the day before. That is all we can really control anyway.

P.S. Nobody else really has it all together either, everyone struggles with something. Just keep moving forward.